It has been a while since I last felt this way. Feeling homesick. Missing the comfort of connecting with old friends.
Busy life has numbed my heart, hasn't it?
I still have no solution to this since 4 years ago when I arrived here. Only pray..
God encouraged my heart today with this verse
Heb 13:8 (The Message)
For Jesus does not change - yesterday, today, tomorrow, he's always totally himself.
It is really heartening to find out this fact that He does not change. When I feel helpless and tattered, He remains as He is. When I feel happy and on cloud on, He remains as He is.
It is really assuring to know that He does not change when I am inconsistent and I, many at times, offer lip services more than surrendering of heart.
When all else fades, my soul will dance with you, where the love lasts forever..
A familar tune played in iTunes as I was revising for my quiz tomorrow. Corrinne May's fly away. I am always reminded of my beloved mummy when I hear this song.
Why does she have to let me go when we can choose to have me stay by her side? It definitely pains her, especially when she knows I'm lonely or when I'm not doing well here. Sometimes it's much worse when I tell her I miss home. God, will I ever go back to be with my family for good? This question always stick around my head and it has yet to go away.
Corrinne May - Fly Away
"When will you be home?" she asks
as we watch the planes take off
We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead
She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled
As a child, she was my world
And now to let me go, I know she bleeds
and yet she says to me
You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
Autumn leaves fell into spring time and
SIlver-painted hair
Daddy called one evening saying
"We need you. Please come back"
When I saw her laying in her bed
Fragile as a child
Pale just like an angel taking flight
I held her as I cried
You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
ohh...
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
Despite it all, still I'm called to fulfill the great commission.
God reminded me of my relationship with him when I was still young in faith. God reminded me that I asked of Him to build a bridge that connects my heart to His. That image means so much to me because it was one of the prayers that I made to God when I was very young back then. I asked Him to allow my heart of worship to reach out to His heart and to touch His heart. Nothing matters much more than my relationship with Him, even in the midst of storms and turbulence.